Monday, October 12, 2009

Go away bullies

A few years back, a fren of mine used to bully me a lot to the extent where i went to my best frens and boyfren (at that time) with tonnes of grudges and litres of tears. I hid my feelings and stayed strong till I entered the space i belong.

The same experience when i got slapped by a boy on the bus when i was just 7. I did not cry and did not seek for any help from others until I got down from the bus and ran to my mom who was waiting for me outside my place. Went right into mom's arms and burst into tears. After knowing the story from the little me who was trying to catch her breathe from all the crying, mom did bring me to confront the boy. I pulled her back and i had no idea why. He bullied me, slapped me, insulted me for no reason but yet i refused to confront him. I let it go. And i guess the oni reason i can give now is just i simply hate confrontation.

No matter how old u get, u still get bullied in many ways. Some will confront the bullies while some will not. I want to confront them but yet i don't. Bcos i suck at confrontation and i would still end up tearing or get more misunderstood.

That ain mean i can stand bullies. I hate them. To the core. I hate them not for bullying me, but for not knowing that they are ruining my life.

I don;t want to see them or face them. If i have a choice, i dont even want to know them. They strike, hurt u, walk away and leave u the mess. Subsequently, the people around u get affected.

I miss the familiar space i belong. I miss the people who love me. I miss the people who truly care for me. I miss being protected. I miss having someone to take away my sorrow. I miss having someone to tell me to stay strong and not cry for people who r not even worth mentioning in my life. I want to be just like a kid who can go to anyone and cry out loud with no worries. I miss the strong me. I miss not being vulnerable. I miss ...........

Go away u *** of a B**ch. or should i say just ***ch. Don't push ur luck. There is a limit to everything.


14 comments:

mase said...

Hey CW, be strong.

ckcw5 said...

thanks..:)

mase said...

Good on ya =)

ckcw5 said...

Thanks Mase. U r?

mase said...

Hey CW, I am just a bloke who lives in Melbourne, stumbled on your blog and thought I give my two cents worth =)

mase said...

Not really, work life is tough enough. Just a simple guy who treasures his after hours.

ckcw5 said...

Ok cool. What do you work as??

mase said...

IT Security. Have you graduated yet? Let see how many comments we can choke up to :P

ckcw5 said...

Where did u find the link to this blog?

mase said...

From Christina Aguilera - Tan Emocional song. Abit of reading/googling branches out from there.

ckcw5 said...

cool.. nice to meet u

mase said...

Sama...How did this name vida emocional started, if you dont mind me asking?

ckcw5 said...

cool. where r u from?
vida emocional=emotional life

mase said...

From a small island below Malaysia where most hobbies are movies and shopping. Email from now? perthboy_99@yahoo.com cheers.